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Confederate…

Confederate…

So, the creators of Game of Thrones are producing an HBO series set in an alternate future where slavery still exists in the U.S.

David Benioff and Dan Weiss, who adapted “Game of Thrones” from George R.R. Martin’s “A Song of Ice and Fire” books, will write and direct an original series called “Confederate,” HBO said on Wednesday.

The show is set in an alternative reality in a nation where slavery is still legal and southern U.S. states have seceded. HBO said the series “chronicles the events leading to the Third American Civil War.”

White folks fantasize about the Confederacy winning more than I fantasized about Janet Jackson during her bare midriff period. Also, none of these “what ifs” involve black people getting fed up and killing their asses by 1925. No, we’re all Song of the South in 2015 — tap dancing and shoe shining. That’s what they think of us. I want the “What If” movie where we went Zimbabwe on the U.S. and I’m living like Jay-Z while Donald Trump Jr trims my hedges and Ivanka is scrubbing my toilet seat with the toothbrush I make her bring from home

 
 

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Obama Derangement Syndrome Continues…

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MISS SCARLET: Why would Obama want to interview someone in his bathtub?

WADSWORTH: I think he meant that a woman conducted an interview with President Obama while she was eating Froot Loops in her bathtub.

MISS SCARLET: What does that have to do with Trump being a sexist prick?

WADSWORTH: I have no clue.

 
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Posted by on June 29, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

Small Talk Roulette…

Guy next to me at coffee shop opened a networking meeting with a woman he *just met* by asking her what she did on Father’s Day.

Options here are:

1) Father’s dead or seriously ill

2) Father’s an asshat and they are estranged.

3) They had brunch and she bought him a tie.

Seems a risky game of Small Talk Roulette.

 
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Posted by on June 19, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

What’s My Mantra?

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That’s not what “mantra” means, you blubbering idiot. Worse, Handel’s entire statement seems cobbled together from bad corporate speak: “He’s completely aligned…” Next, she’ll zing him for not being “proactive.”

 

 

 
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Posted by on June 18, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

Lex Luthor for President…

Somehow, Lex Luthor as president with Braniac as his chief adviser seems less terrifying than what we currently have. LuthorCorp was a successful business and Braniac, while a Kryptonian artifical intelligence, at least loathed all humans equally.

 
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Posted by on February 16, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

What in the hell is Bernie Sanders doing?

So, Bernie Sanders, who still isn’t really a Democrat, tweeted this today:

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This is bad strategy. Like, in the not-successful, really sucky, we don’t get House back, Trump gets re-elected way. Do we need to dig through tweets from Marco Rubio, Paul Ryan and other prominent Republicans during the Obama years? They never did this.

Sure, Ted Cruz went after other Republicans, but he was loathed as a result, which is his own party couldn’t rally behind him against an unhinged reality TV host. And Cruz at least focused most of his ire on Democrats and the left. He also constantly harkened back to the Reagan “Golden Years.” Sanders would be hard pressed to name one Democratic president he likes.

This is just bad messaging. Republicans control all branches of government. They aren’t going to attack themselves. Nor are they going to blame themselves for the inevitable disasters resulting from their “unified government.” So, can we expect the next four years to consist of both the right and left saying how much Democrats suck? How does that lead to victory of any kind?

This isn’t to suggest that the Democratic party shouldn’t change into a non-having-its-ass-kicked party. I’m all in favor of that. But focus on the positives of the party. I know Sanders believes Trump’s only in office because he didn’t win the nomination but this is petty and pointless.

Oh, and this was the first response to his tweet.

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This is the platform for the Justice Democrats, the folks who are working to ensure a second Trump term. It’s not even really a political platform. It’s more like something scribbled onto the rolling paper of a joint. It’s so stupid and fantastical, it makes you want to french kiss Ayn Rand’s corpse.

 

 

 
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Posted by on February 11, 2017 in Political Theatre, Uncategorized

 

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Alternative Facts

While I watched Kellyanne Conway lie her way through her latest appearance on Meet the Press, I thought about Aziz Ansari’s SNL monologue last night,  where he implied that you couldn’t consider “all” Trump voters racist because, well, there were a lot of them (more than 60 million). We’ve heard this a lot recently, and it’s another form of “alternative facts.” Prior to Trump’s surprise win, the liberal punditry (and many conservatives) predicted that Trump would lose by Goldwater levels. If that had happened, right now, there’d be no question that anyone who supported a candidate who ran such a racist, misogynistic campaign was themselves culpable of racism and misogyny. Nothing really *changed* about Trump but sheer volume of his support. So, if I record an album of myself singing Kander and Ebb in the shower, it’s no less objectively awful than if 60 people buy it than if 60 million people do. But in the fact of collective madness, we must grasp at “alternative facts.” Maybe my competitors didn’t run a “good campaign.” Maybe there was something in my album that resonated with people beyond my tone deafness. Nothing really good comes of embracing “alternative facts,” no matter how unpleasant “actual facts” are.

 
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Posted by on January 22, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

This would make a great Will Ferrell comedy but since this isn’t fiction, we’re all going to die.

This would make a great Will Ferrell comedy but since this isn’t fiction, we’re all going to die.
 
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Posted by on January 18, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

I love these Magic Eye puzzles. If you look closely enough, you’ll see the end of the American Democratic Experiment.

I love these Magic Eye puzzles. If you look closely enough, you’ll see the end of the American Democratic Experiment.
 
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Posted by on January 18, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

Trump Begins…

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If you’re casting a vote  using a similar line of logic as Batman villain Ra’s al Ghul, you might want to reconsider.

 

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