RSS

Category Archives: Social Commentary

Making Nice with Nazis…

“Oh my god, there are Nazis marching in the streets!”

“Well, don’t punch them!”

“OK, well, I’m going to publicly identify them!”

“Wait, that might endanger their lives!”

“Are you kidding me? We’re talking about flippin’ Nazis! Oh fine, I’ll privately contact their employers.”

“What? You would deprive a Nazi of their livelihood? Would you like someone to do that to you because you’re gay and were at a Pride parade! Or were black and talking to a Jewish person about fried chicken?”

“That is so completely not the same thing.”

“I am fine with minorities existing. Why can’t you tolerate Nazis?”

“OK, I think now you want me punch to *you*.”

 
 

Tags: , ,

Anthony Scaramucci, RIP…

Ten or so days ago:

IVANKA: So, Dad, I know we’re getting killed out there with Russia… and, well, everything else related to running the country, but we think some exciting staffing changes sould turn things around.

TRUMP: Whattaya got in mind? Sexy broad? Sexier broad?

KUSHNER: No, the White House chain of command needs to go mouse (POINTS AT HIMSELF), cat (POINTS AT IVANKA)… mooch.

IVANKA: We in the administration want a Communications Director with attitude. He’s edgy. He’s in your face. You’ve heard the expression “Let’s get busy?” Well, this is communications director who gets biz-ay, consistently and thoroughly.

TRUMP: So, he’s proactive, huh?

IVANKA: Oh, God yes, we’re talking about a totally outrageous paradigm.

SPICER: Excuse me, but “proactive” and “paradigm”? Aren’t these just buzzwords that dumb people use to sound important? Not that I’m accusing you of anything like that… I’m fired, aren’t I?

 

Ten or so days later:

 

 

Tags: , , , , ,

Confederate…

Confederate…

So, the creators of Game of Thrones are producing an HBO series set in an alternate future where slavery still exists in the U.S.

David Benioff and Dan Weiss, who adapted “Game of Thrones” from George R.R. Martin’s “A Song of Ice and Fire” books, will write and direct an original series called “Confederate,” HBO said on Wednesday.

The show is set in an alternative reality in a nation where slavery is still legal and southern U.S. states have seceded. HBO said the series “chronicles the events leading to the Third American Civil War.”

White folks fantasize about the Confederacy winning more than I fantasized about Janet Jackson during her bare midriff period. Also, none of these “what ifs” involve black people getting fed up and killing their asses by 1925. No, we’re all Song of the South in 2015 — tap dancing and shoe shining. That’s what they think of us. I want the “What If” movie where we went Zimbabwe on the U.S. and I’m living like Jay-Z while Donald Trump Jr trims my hedges and Ivanka is scrubbing my toilet seat with the toothbrush I make her bring from home

 
 

Tags: ,

Battle Royale…

Trump’s Thursday morning tweets, in which he called the “Morning Joe” host “crazy” and claimed she was “bleeding badly from a face-lift” when she visited his Florida resort early this year, earned widespread condemnation throughout the day, including from several Republicans on Capitol Hill.

But Sanders argued that the president had every right to “hit back” at “the liberal media” and “Hollywood elites” when they criticize him — and deflected questions about whether the insults were beneath the presidency.

“I don’t think you can expect someone to be personally attacked day after day, minute by minute, and sit back,” Sanders said, arguing that the criticism the president and his aides endure is often personal in nature. “When the president gets hit, he’s going to hit back harder.”

Mika sure is a fearsome foe for the most powerful man in the world. I recall the Gerald Ford-Charo smackdown of the mid-70s that divided a nation.

 

 

 

Tags: , , ,

Health Scare 2…

Health Scar 2

DOCTOR: “I’m flattered you’ve spent 40% of your income to see me, but maybe you want to consider reinvesting that money into, well, food and shelter? It might help with the malnutrition and frost bite. That’ll be a $200 co-pay for this visit. Now please don’t die outside my office. It’s just depressing.”

 

Tags: , , , , ,

Spare me…

The police statements after events like the Castillo killing/inevitable officer acquittal are rarely made to reassure POC but to calm moderate whites. There are no promises of better outcomes,  that another POC won’t be pulled over for having a black nose or shot in front of their child because of what an officer has a “split second” to decide. Basically the argument is “sucks to be us.”

And I’ve had it with the solipsistic narcissism of how shooting a man to death in front of his child and the child’s mother is really a bummer for the cop. Even if he’s in therapy dealing with it, it’s hardly as relevant as what the dead man and his loved ones are experiencing. I also am highly suspicious of how much this truly has affected the officer. I mean Bill Cosby is probably stressed out but that’s all about him, his reputation, career and liberty, not the women he raped.

If the cop offered to help raise the now fatherless child like Joe West on The Flash, that’s one thing but that’s not even a consideration.

We continue to debate whether racism or “white privilege” even exists when predominately white juries not only consistently let officers walk for these killings but never express the consistent level of outrage or demands for change that we see as a the result of airline overbookings. I can almost understand the cognitive dissonance and classism behind safely assuming you’ll never be busted for selling loose cigarettes or CDs, but if white Americans really believed they had as much chance of being blown away — again in front of their child — during a routine traffic stop or their child could be killed for playing with a toy gun in a public park, they wouldn’t stand for it. 

 
1 Comment

Posted by on June 21, 2017 in Social Commentary

 

Tags: , ,

Image

Copywriting Fails…

seriously?

 
 

Tags: ,

Badly done, Jared…

From the Business Insider:

The FBI has subpoenaed an affidavit containing alleged texts between former Subway spokesman Jared Fogle and a former female Subway franchisee in which Fogle says he paid for sex with a 16-year-old girl, according to the former franchisee’s attorney.

On June 19, the lawyer says that Fogle again asked the woman to advertise herself on Craigslist. She responds: “Is this the same website you found that 16 year old girl you that you f*****? …I still can’t believe you only paid $100 for her.”

Fogle responds: “It was amazing!!!!”

She asks: “What part of her ad made you think she was selling sex?”

He says: “U will have to read them to see.”

The age of consent in Indiana, where Fogle resides, is 16 years old.

First place, whenever someone asks you such a leading question — “I’m going to grab some cash at the corner ATM. Is that the same bank that you robbed at gunpoint and used the funds to buy a warehouse full of cocaine, assault rifles, and bootleg Prince records?” — your response should *not* be to willingly incriminate yourself but to borrow from Eric Stoltz in PULP FICTION and shout, “I don’t know you. Who is this? Prank caller! Prank caller!”

Also, if you’re engaged in this type of activity, shouldn’t you have a “no text” policy? Everything’s verbal or you use code words (“Did you tape DOWNTON ABBEY? YES! It was AMAZING! Very satisfying… episode.”) or invest in that MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE technology where everything self-destructs after 60 seconds.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 1, 2015 in Social Commentary

 

Tags: ,

Facebook “Friend” Requests…

I’ve noticed a Facebook‬ trend where people will post a simple question or request advice and follow that up with a lengthy codicil that basically pleads, “Don’t be an asshole” E.g.: “I’m going to my cousin’s wedding in Tampa. Anyone have any hotel recommendations? Please no comments about how Florida is a cesspool that’s not fit for human habitation.” Or “I’m attending a work conference in Austin, Texas. Any ideas on vegan friendly meal options there? Please no comments on how vegans are patchouli-smoking hippies and I’m wasting my time by going to Texas and not eating a big steak or enjoying the local barbecue.” Or “I have tickets to a Rolling Stones concert. Has anyone gone to a big stadium show before? When’s the best time to arrive? And any tips on parking to avoid the crush when the show lets out? Please no comments on how Mick Jagger is an undead mummy and that the Stones best work was over before I was born and how arena shows are absurdly expensive.” Is this what the Internet has done to us? We can’t just answer someone’s question without unsolicited, meanspirited commentary? Or just not say anything at all? And the requests aren’t paranoid, because we’ve all read the threads where people are, basically, assholes.

 
1 Comment

Posted by on August 1, 2015 in Social Commentary

 

Tags:

Badly done, South Carolina…

From the Greenville News:

Oconee County Coroner Karl Addis released a statement Tuesday saying (Zachary) Hammond died from a gunshot wound to the upper torso, but the statement didn’t indicate if the bullet came from the front or back. He referred questions to SLED, the Seneca Police and the 10th Circuit Solicitor’s Office.

Tori Dianna Morton, 23, of Pickens, was in the car with Hammond but wasn’t hurt. She was arrested for possession of marijuana.

Covington said the officer approached the car with his gun drawn, as is common practice in making narcotics arrests.

An undercover officer had arranged a drug buy to lure Morton into the parking lot of Hardee’s restaurant on U.S. 123, according to an incident report.

The report says the officer executed a search warrant and found a bag of marijuana in the car. It makes no mention of the shooting. Covington said the officer will file a statement later.

Dammit.

I have not been to Paranoia Academy, but how often do people run over cops rather than just try to escape? And even if it occurs a great deal, in the time to draw your weapon and fire *point blank* at the person behind the wheel, can’t you just… get out of the way?

What was the worst-case scenario here? An adult would have purchased a drug that is legal in several U.S. states, a drug that cannot be used to mow down 9 people in a church. Yet, resources are wasted on an undercover “sting” of someone buying marijuana. And now a 19-year-old is dead. DEAD. Why? What the the hell is wrong with a state where this kid could have legally bought an assault rifle, even if he had a history of mental problems, but he’s shot dead because he *drove* someone to buy pot.

If Zachary Hammond lived in Washington or Colorado, he’d be alive. South Carolina, you need to explain to the rest of the civilized world how your residents are safer because of the laws that led to this young man’s death.

Dammit.

 
1 Comment

Posted by on August 1, 2015 in Social Commentary

 

Tags: , , ,